How to Become a Great Leader: Practice Metacognition
Everyone lives inside a story shaped by what they think, perceive, and believe to be true. But not everything we think is true. Our perceptions are often biased, limited, or incomplete.
This shows up everywhere. In how we interpret a colleague’s tone. In the stories we make up about someone’s motives. In the way we decide whether we belong in a room. It shapes how we handle conflict, give feedback, or even see our own strengths and limitations. And it deeply affects how effective we will be as leaders.
One of the ways out of this problem of bias is with the skill of metacognition.
Metacognition simply means thinking about what you think. It is stepping back from your thoughts, emotions, and responses with honesty and curiosity. Instead of being swept along by assumptions or reactive feelings, you learn to notice your inner dialogue and choose how you will respond.
In practice, metacognition can look like critiquing your criticisms, judging your judgements, and questioning your questions.
“With this empowering concept [of metacognition] comes the notion that if we have the power to observe our thoughts, we may also have the power to change them. Rather than falling into the trap of believing that our negative, irrational, and/or unhealthy thoughts are facts, we use mindfulness to observe them and know that our thoughts do not define us—we can observe them, recognize their impact, and opt to edit them.”
I started learning this the hard way, when I moved to the US in my early 20s. At that time, American culture believed some weird stereotypes about Australians (Thanks, Crocodile Dundee), and I was often the first Australian people had met. Those assumptions were sometimes lighthearted, but often they were harmful.
Without metacognition, people often:
Don’t know what they don’t know
Think their way is the right way
Make negative stories about people who are different
Feel threatened and afraid
Treat people badly
This experience helped me discover my own biases, assumptions, stories and judgments, and over time I learned to set them aside so I could have curiosity and connection instead.
It is not about shrinking or shape-shifting to fit in. It is about cultivating curiosity that enables grace-filled connection with people who are different from you. Where assumption is a relationship powder keg, metacognition disarms.
Metacognition has given me the ability to step back to see the beauty in people, learn something from everyone, and extend grace in conflict.
I am not a metacognition whizz. It is still an intentional practice I choose daily. But I am deeply grateful to have it in my life toolkit. It helps me navigate the complexities of people, cultures, and leadership.
Metacognition is a leadership superpower!
It lifts you above the swirl of social dynamics and gives you a higher vantage point. From there, you can pause instead of react, choose with intention, and bring steadiness when others are caught in confusion or emotion.
Without it, we drift on autopilot. Habits, assumptions, and unexamined beliefs take the lead.
Leaders who practice metacognition:
Recognise emotional triggers and choose healthy responses
Understand their strengths and limitations without being defined by them
Notice when their perspective is narrow and seek other voices
Take responsibility for how they show up
Model a way of thinking that invites others into health
So how do you begin? Acknowledge that you cannot believe everything you think. Step back and start questioning your assumptions.
One of the most powerful ways I have found is to ask myself: What story am I telling myself about this situation or person?
That single question creates space to notice what is real and what is assumption, and to choose a wiser response.
The more you practice, the more clarity and choice you bring into every interaction.
Metacognition creates powerful self-awareness that brings sharper discernment, stronger connections, and leadership wisdom that people can trust. It takes time to develop, but it is deeply transformative. It changes how you see yourself, how you see others, and how you lead.
No one ever becomes an expert. Metacognition is not about mastery but about posture and practice. Every human carries bias and self-protecting perceptions. But practicing awareness of your thoughts brings more wisdom, more humility, and more clarity for the way you live and lead.
With you in the journey,
Justine
Reflection question:
Think of a situation or person you’re struggling with. Try using the guiding questions to reflect:
What story am I telling myself about this situation or person?
Resource recommendation:
“Thinking about Thinking” podcast with Simon Sinek, Brene Brown and Adam Grant